Let me admit that a trip to the doctor makes me nervous. I can't remember the last encounter I had in an office, over the phone, or during a procedure that went the way it should have. I need to admit this first because I recognize I don't have a lot of faith in the system that takes care of our health and bodies, and I wish to see people like me receive the best care possible.​

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​I have an identified mass in my left breast. It's been there for years. It's been biopsied, scanned, and labeled benign. Unfortunately, health care being what it is—insurance changes on top of four different MDs assigned and disappeared in less than two years—I didn't have follow up. I dug up my old orders and requested to have it checked again. 6 weeks later and over 10 phone calls just trying to make the initial appointment, and I have people with my file asking why I need any tests at all. "You're not allowed to get this or that test your doctor ordered, you're too young, do you have any symptoms?" Well, sure, there's a mass in my chest. Finally at my ultrasound, the technician tells me I shouldn't have to be there since it was already biopsied. "You should be set for life."

 

I don't know to express how disheartening it is to have every medical interaction repeat the same frustrations, the time spent, and lack of care. And this last appointment went much better than the dozens of others where I left in tears, afraid for my safety and wellbeing at the hands of doctors. It can only go wrong so many times before you lose hope of it getting better.

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Poesie is for women like me who struggle to find the adequate care they need. She reminds me of my mom, the person whose hugs do more for me than any medicine, and the too-many other women I know who have battled cancer and medical neglect. A portion of profits collected by Poesie sales will go to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation, an organization dedicating their research efforts to end breast cancer.